HANEEM'S DIARY: For the sake of love

Ralia dissolved in to laughter as I narrated what Abba did to me. It was a week later and I was still annoyed.
I had spent almost all day at Ralia's -my cousin- house. I went with Abba but unfortunately, the little boy slept off before we left the house so I had to carry him. Ralia carried my bag-because I had complained about Abba's weight- and her mini suitcase. The sound of Ralia's laughter made him shift in his sleep.
Ralia is my favorite cousin. Although she is three years older than me,we talk like age mates. She was a final year student of Biochemistry at Ahmadu Bello University,Zaria. At the same time,the family was preparing for her wedding.
We had agreed that I will spend the day at Ralia's then she will spend the night at my house. This was a kind of tradition for us. We would take turns to sleepover at eachpthers house every once in a while.

Ralia's house was a very quiet close. There were seberal other houses there. The ground outside Ralia's house was very sandy which I did not like because the
sand kept getting in to my slippers.

We took our leave after our Isha prayer(the fifth and final prayer for the day) I have always hated going out at night and I was not so pleased with having to leave so late but Ralia had pleaded with me earlier not to take a taxi but to wait for her fiance to drop us off. We had been standing there for less than 10 minutes and the mosquitoes had already found there way in to my skirt and started to bite my legs. Ralia was safe from their attacks because she wore a long hijab and socks. At that time I wished I had at least put on my socks.

Just as Ralia finished laughing at me, I noticed a car approaching. I did not pay much attention to the car thinking it would pass. The sound of the engine got closer but It was difficult for me to see the face of the driver because of the powerful headlight. As the car got even closer I managed to observe that it was a black sienna. It pulled over in front of us.
"He is here"Ralia beamed.

I needed no further explanation. She Opened the door of the backseat for me. As I entered, I greeted the her fiance. He answered me cheerfully. I immediately believed everything I had heard about him. I balanced Abba on my laps and rested his head on my chest.

I have always hated being around couples and that situation certainly was not an exception. I engaged in my favorite past time-day dreaming. I got so distracted that something happened between the Ralia and her fiance,umar.

He turned back and flashed me a smile I found suspicious. I shifted uncomfortably. Just then, A nokia tune ringtone pierced the silence,increasing the tension in the car.

"Hello sweetheart!" Umar began.

My body stiffened. I could feel Ralia's tension from where I sat.

"I'm sorry love, I'll be with you shortly." he added.

The distance from Ralia's house to mine was less than 20minutes but I felt like it was more than two hours. It was a very quiet drive except for Ralia who was directing Umar.

Finally, the car took the last turn that was only three houses away from my house. The car pulled over in front of that familiar Brown colored gate.

I moved Abba from my laps to my shoulder as I opened the door.

"Good night" Umar said. "Its too bad we had to meet like this,I've heard a lot about you," he added.

"yeah" I murmured- accompanied with a fake smile- as I got off the car.

I waited for Ralia inside the house just by the gate. My shoulders were very much strained because of Abba's weight but I was not in a hurry to get inside the house.

When she joined me, the was an obvious sign of hurt on her face. This made me hold all the questions I had prepared to ask her. We walked inside in silence.

After we had showered and changed in to our night gowns,I could no longer hold it in.

"Ralia, what exactly are you doing?" I asked

" What do you mean?" she queried clearly pretending not to know what I meant.

" You know what I mean Ralia" I accused.

"Haneem,believe me" she started,he is not who you think,he's just as i've always described him,he just changed recently" she reassured.

"Ralia,the wedding should not go on if he is like this. I want you to be happy,I want you to have a good man in your life" I cried.

"He is a good man sis,believe me I know it,he is just going through a phase I'm sure it'll pass" she said almost in a whisper.

"What if it doesn't?"

"Haneem,I have what many people long for,this little problems are nothing to me" Ralia went on.

"Ralia don't do this to yourself please,I'm begging you" I pleaded.

"Haneem dear,the wedding will go on In Shaa Allah(By the grace of God), I will become his wife,I'm ready to tolerate anything" Ralia ended.

As I went to sleep,my heart was filled with grief and pity for Ralia,she was determined and commited to live with daily heartbreak all for the sake of love.

Ralia dissolved in to laughter as I narrated what Abba did to me. It was a week later and I was still annoyed.
I had spent almost all day at Ralia's -my cousin- house. I went with Abba but unfortunately, the little boy slept off before we left the house so I had to carry him. Ralia carried my bag-because I had complained about Abba's weight- and her mini suitcase. The sound of Ralia's laughter made him shift in his sleep.
Ralia is my favorite cousin. Although she is three years older than me,we talk like age mates. She was a final year student of Biochemistry at Ahmadu Bello University,Zaria. At the same time,the family was preparing for her wedding.
We had agreed that I will spend the day at Ralia's then she will spend the night at my house. This was a kind of tradition for us. We would take turns to sleepover at eachpthers house every once in a while.

Ralia's house was a very quiet close. There were seberal other houses there. The ground outside Ralia's house was very sandy which I did not like because the
sand kept getting in to my slippers.

We took our leave after our Isha prayer(the fifth and final prayer for the day) I have always hated going out at night and I was not so pleased with having to leave so late but Ralia had pleaded with me earlier not to take a taxi but to wait for her fiance to drop us off. We had been standing there for less than 10 minutes and the mosquitoes had already found there way in to my skirt and started to bite my legs. Ralia was safe from their attacks because she wore a long hijab and socks. At that time I wished I had at least put on my socks.

Just as Ralia finished laughing at me, I noticed a car approaching. I did not pay much attention to the car thinking it would pass. The sound of the engine got closer but It was difficult for me to see the face of the driver because of the powerful headlight. As the car got even closer I managed to observe that it was a black sienna. It pulled over in front of us.
"He is here"Ralia beamed.

I needed no further explanation. She Opened the door of the backseat for me. As I entered, I greeted the her fiance. He answered me cheerfully. I immediately believed everything I had heard about him. I balanced Abba on my laps and rested his head on my chest.

I have always hated being around couples and that situation certainly was not an exception. I engaged in my favorite past time-day dreaming. I got so distracted that something happened between the Ralia and her fiance,umar.

He turned back and flashed me a smile I found suspicious. I shifted uncomfortably. Just then, A nokia tune ringtone pierced the silence,increasing the tension in the car.

"Hello sweetheart!" Umar began.

My body stiffened. I could feel Ralia's tension from where I sat.

"I'm sorry love, I'll be with you shortly." he added.

The distance from Ralia's house to mine was less than 20minutes but I felt like it was more than two hours. It was a very quiet drive except for Ralia who was directing Umar.

Finally, the car took the last turn that was only three houses away from my house. The car pulled over in front of that familiar Brown colored gate.

I moved Abba from my laps to my shoulder as I opened the door.

"Good night" Umar said. "Its too bad we had to meet like this,I've heard a lot about you," he added.

"yeah" I murmured- accompanied with a fake smile- as I got off the car.

I waited for Ralia inside the house just by the gate. My shoulders were very much strained because of Abba's weight but I was not in a hurry to get inside the house.

When she joined me, the was an obvious sign of hurt on her face. This made me hold all the questions I had prepared to ask her. We walked inside in silence.

After we had showered and changed in to our night gowns,I could no longer hold it in.

"Ralia, what exactly are you doing?" I asked

" What do you mean?" she queried clearly pretending not to know what I meant.

" You know what I mean Ralia" I accused.

"Haneem,believe me" she started,he is not who you think,he's just as i've always described him,he just changed recently" she reassured.

"Ralia,the wedding should not go on if he is like this. I want you to be happy,I want you to have a good man in your life" I cried.

"He is a good man sis,believe me I know it,he is just going through a phase I'm sure it'll pass" she said almost in a whisper.

"What if it doesn't?"

"Haneem,I have what many people long for,this little problems are nothing to me" Ralia went on.

"Ralia don't do this to yourself please,I'm begging you" I pleaded.

"Haneem dear,the wedding will go on In Shaa Allah(By the grace of God), I will become his wife,I'm ready to tolerate anything" Ralia ended.

As I went to sleep,my heart was filled with grief and pity for Ralia,she was determined and commited to live with daily heartbreak all for the sake of love.

Outfit of the day

Hello There! I wanted to do an outfit of the day blogpost. My outfit is chic and casual. This is one way for a hijabi to wear vests. I've had the vest for a while but I couldn't wear it out until I came across the shirt.
Also,if you look closely,you'll notice a sleeve under my shirt. I was a little bit uncomfortable with the length of the shirt's sleeve. This is the first time I tried wearing purple and pink and I liked the outcome. I hope you're inspired.




P.S:I was supposed to make this blogpost yesterday but I was unable to that because of school work.

HANEEM'S DIARY: Pest Of Nature

I stretched my legs fully so as to relax myself. The sound of dolly parton's 'coat of many colours' boomed from my ear piece. It was the perfect picture of relaxation but Alas! It did not last long.

Just as I closed my eyes and prepared to sleep,a familiar voice pierced the silence of the air around me.
'HANEEM!' the voice called.
I jumped up in fright. A petite figure appeared in front of me
"come and see what has happened,"he said.
It was my younger brother Abba;before I could say a word,he pulled my hand and dragged me outside towards the gate.
'What has happened'? I asked.
He ignored my question which made me even more nervous. I tried to think of what might have happened.

'Did someone die?','Did Mallam Audu the shop keeper get hit by a car?' 'Did...
I continued to ponder on what might have happened. I didn't care that I was bare footed or that I did not even put on a veil. My heart was pounding like a drum.

The longer we ran,the more anxious I felt. We had passed the. supermarket,the drug store even the car wash!
Finally,Abba started to reduce his speed and I felt a little bit relieved.
'I will soon find out what has happened' I thought.
'wait a minute...,' I paused. 'But this is the football field'
'yes!' he answered. I could see the excitement in his eyes. 'Well...tell me,what has happened?' I asked impatiently.
'My friend's brother has bought a new ball and he said I can play with it whenever I want!'

I could feel the anger through my veins,I was so annoyed that I felt speechless...I thought of how he dragged me from my room,the distance I ran bare footed!
'Mtsw' I hissed as I lazily walked back home.'Pest of nature!' I thought.

P.S: Haneem's diary is a fictional series based on things I witness,experience and imagine. Haneem is Meenah spelled backwards which is one of my many nicknames. I wrote 'pest of nature' two years ago. It was the first story I wrote under Haneem's diary. Since I'm starting all over again, I thought It would be best to start from the beginning. By Gods grace, Haneem's diary will have a new story up ever Saturday. Hope you enjoy it!

Always be yourself

Hello everyone! Belated happy new year! I'm sorry for that. I resumed school early this year so I've been a little bit busy.

Have you noticed that the world changes constantly? The views of people also changes. Today,the world views skinny people in a way,tomorrow being skinny is the most attractive thing ever. This modern idea of how people should look might just sound to you like it doesn't matter.

However,there are several cases of people especially young girls being displeased with their bodies. Its mostly about their weights but sometimes other things like their face,nose,chest area and so on. This I believe greatly reduces their confidence and self esteem.

This believe is caused by the impossible world created by or because of celebrities. These people live most of their famous lives under pressure. The media expect them to be flawless which is really impossible in reality. They are expected to look and be perfect. In their situation they really have no choice but to at least try. Most of them not only pull it off,they manage to make it look fun and easy. So this impossible figure and body starts to look more possible which makes ordinary girls hate themselves for not looking like that or at least close to that.

The number one secret to surviving in life is to be yourself,love yourself and accept your flaws. Accept that you're not perfect. This will protect you from a lot of things. Its okay to want lose weight or be fit just as long as you don't make yourself feel like you're useless.

Ignore people's mean comments. Whatever you do in life they'll just keep complaining. I know this because I had my own fair share of that.

At one point in my life, peoples comments started getting to me. "you're too skinny, when you walk its like the wind is going to blow you away..." "she moves like a spaghetti..." and so on. The comments cut me deep inside,it hurt a lot hearing such things. "She's weak,just look at her..." Amazingly,Through all of these something stayed permanent,I loved and still am okay with my skinny figure. I honestly don't wish to gain much weight-not because of d trend,no-Just because this is how I've always been and I love it.

For a while recently,I felt like perhaps,I shouldn't put on make up anymore. My makeup to school is mostly light but my friends go for the lightest make up like just a little bit of lipstick and thats it. So I thought for a second perhaps I should give it up too so that i'll just blend in,you know fit in perfectly. All of us are hijabies but they mostly use the long traditional hijab while I-for my love of fashion- chose a different type of hijab,so I'd wear trousers with a long top or with a bollero. This too-within those few seconds- I thought of giving up. I quickly realized that perhaps i'm different. No! The truth is i'm actually different,I have different interests and different likes thats what makes me who I am.

What I'm saying is,you should not compare yourself to others in anyway. We are all different. It'll only confuse you. Be true to your self, we are all only human,we have feelings and we change but there are things about us that don't change. In trying to change them we're trying to change who we are. But for who? For the world that keeps on changing? Is it really worth it?

With growing up,I realized that we are all different in every aspect,sure we might share interests or even characters but we can never be the same. So embrace your difference, its your uniqueness. After all it makes you stand out. Be yourself,love yourself and accept who you are!